Books I’m reading – The Power of Habit by Chares Duhigg
In a departure from totally focusing on subscription boxes this week, I’ve been reading a new book called The Power of Habit. It inspired me to write a little bit about habits and my own experiences with them.
PS – I recorded my first YouTube video in a long time this past weekend, it’s still being edited but I’ll link to it next week. I’m going to try and produce one video per week. If you have any topics you would like covered please reply and let me know.
I presume you will want general help with getting more subscribers but if you have anything specifically you’re stuck on I can make videos that will help you, so let me know.
- Your habits precede your success
Did you know that habits that become automatic actually light up a different area of the brain vs behaviours that are not automatic?
What this means is when you are consciously doing something your mind spends a lot of energy deciding to execute a particular task, getting up early, going to the gym, meditating before work etc
When these behaviours are repeated often enough, they become a habit. Then once the habit is formed, they are easier to keep doing than they were to start doing.
This means, when you are starting a new habit, it takes more mental energy to do the new behaviour than it does to continue to do your old habits.
One thing to remember; your brain is very good at saving energy.
This is important if you decided at some time in your life you want to become a successful online business owner, lose weight or start getting up earlier.
Because you will not achieve the results you desire without first mastering your habits.
Let that sink in.
You need to master the daily activities which lead to success in order to achieve that success.
If you do this successfully and consistently then eventually you will get the results, it’s almost impossible NOT to.
If however, you do NOT master your daily habits, or even worse the habits you have are currently self-destructive or unproductive – you will never get any closer to building the life you desire.
I have many good habits now. Some took a lot of energy to get started, others less so.
I have a habit tracker in which I cross off a little X every day when I do the good habit I intended to do.
I do these things every day now, and they are automatic. My mind just knows to do them
My advice is to list out some priorities in your life and figure out what are the habits you need to consistently execute to achieve those results. Write them down, and start tracking how often you actually do them.
Use a pen and cross an X in the box, then simply never break the chain. This is called the Seinfeld strategy.
Successful people are simply those with successful habits. – Brian Tracy
Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement. – James Clear – Author of Atomic Habits
Why are habits hard to master?
The big problem with habits is just that, they are hard to break and hard to form. Easy to avoid change and easy to keep doing what you’ve always done.
The benefit of actually looking at your life through this lens is incredibly powerful and liberating.
You can literally achieve almost anything simply by practising the behaviours which lead you to a certain goal.
“But I don’t have time, life is too stressful”. – You can results or excuses, but nor both – Arnold Schwarzenegger
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Cornerstone Habits
My cornerstone habit was exercising in the gym.
Let me take you back to January 2015. I had spent the last 5 years drinking, partying and taking drugs with my friends almost every weekend.
Maybe I had some periods when I was in a relationship when I took it easy but by and large my late teens to early 20s were spent like this.
I had a habit of drinking and partying every weekend when I would wake up Monday morning I would vow “That’s it!, I feel like crap today, I’m off everything” and by Friday night I’d be right back on it.
I woke up one day in January 2015 (a January gym bro) and I went with my friend to the gym. We went after work, we ended up in a routine, and soon enough it was a habit.
That I can honestly say was the turning point in my life. Not instantly, but it started me on the path I am currently on today.
I had a good habit in my life, and since I wanted to keep doing it, alcohol, drugs and partying were detrimental to my performance in the gym or my chances of ending up in the gym at all.
Eventually, (over a period of 12 months) my good habit led to more good habits, better nutrition, better sleep, and improved confidence.
While I gradually stopped going out as often, decided I wanted to achieve success in life, and realised it was time to leave the country and start my life over in Canada
I came back eventually, launched by online business, kept going to the gym and lost 14Kg, launched a second and third online business and now intend to keep growing and succeeding in all areas of my life.
I can’t say I’ve made it just yet, but I am on the path I set for myself and it’s totally different to where I was 8 years ago. Luckily the habit I formed also brings with it many mental and physical benefits which led to a trail of good habits in its wake.
So let’s talk about some ways to form good habits in your life just like I did
Habit Formation
My advice based on my personal experience is to form a habit in total contrast to your current bad habits. I found it incredibly difficult to just STOP doing what I was doing. Our minds don’t allow for any empty space. I believe it is easier to START a good habit than it is to stop a bad one.
Let the good one kick the bad one out over time, and you’ll REPLACE the bad habit with a good one.
So here are my top 5 tips to create the habits you need to execute in order to build the life of your dreams.
First I’d like to give you a few areas of your life I suggest improving if you need to:
These are universal priorities for any person looking to live a great life.
Health – Gym, running, walking, swimming, sports, mental health
Wealth – Side hustle, learning online marketing, financial literacy
Family – spending time with kids, focusing on your spouse, being present
Of course, this list is not exhaustive but my experience has been to focus on the big things and usually the small things fall into place.
OK so now you have an idea what habits you form can make a positive impact on your life, let’s discuss strategies for how to form these habits.
- Cue/trigger, routine, reward
First off, start with small, achievable goals – choose an activity that can also help you to get enjoyment from it.
Deciding you’re running a half marathon next week is not a good strategy for a couch potato to get started.
If your goal is related to exercise, walk in the local park or on the beach – be present with the beauty you see.
Step 1 – Cue or Trigger
Pair the habit with a trigger, like waking up or having coffee or arriving home from work
You already have habits in your life. Instead of trying to simply remember to do something or to create a trigger, think of a time in your day when you can insert the new habit to an existing time of opportunity.
For example, if your habit is to read more self-help books, after you read your kids their bedtime story, you leave the room and read by yourself for 15 minutes.
Or if you want to go for a morning run, decide you will do it right after you eat your breakfast, or straight after dropping the kids at work. A bonus tip is to put on your workout clothes in the morning – I’ve never taken my workout clothes off without working out.
The cue is putting your kids to bed, or finishing your breakfast.
Step 2 – Routine
Consistency is key – same time, same place
Of course, if you set your habit to be after church on Sunday, you’re unlikely to stick to it Monday to Saturday if you don’t go to the church those days. This is another key to habit formation is to try and stick to it at the same time and same place every day until it becomes automatic.
Finding an alternative time every single day requires mental energy that our brains are reluctant to spend. Find a time in the day that suits you, and stick to it as best you can. If you fall off, set timers or alarms to remind you every day.
My calendar and reminders are full of daily notes to meditate, not to drink alcohol today, to log my current weight, to make my girlfriend feel appreciated etc.
Another tip is to use visual cues to remind you of the routine
So if you want to exercise more, put your workout clothes somewhere obvious in your house so you can do it first thing in the morning or first thing after work before the couch calls.
Leave your workout clothes on the bedside so you would have to spend more energy deciding what to wear when you wake up than just putting them on instead.
Step 3 – Reward
Reward yourself for sticking to it for that day at least – that’s a huge achievement. Sometimes the reward can be inherent, like experiencing a runner’s high or seeing a beautiful sunrise on your morning walk.
Other times, you can just congratulate yourself or save your morning coffee for after the gym; it tastes much better anyway. What about making a healthy smoothie after every run or gym session?
Rewarding yourself can be anything, build up your rewards all week and go for a nice meal on the weekends. Avoid rewards that totally reverse your progress if possible.
Even I struggle with this sometimes with cheat days and beers when I’m not singing from my own hymn sheet (no one’s perfect and I am not a robot 🤖), but in general, I am getting better also.
Final point here – don’t beat yourself up if you fall off or miss one day – simply get right back on the horse.
You’re making a big and difficult change for the better, remember your brain wants you to keep doing what you’ve always done. But you now know, you’ll keep getting what you’ve always gotten if you do.
When you master your habits, your life will shift onto the path you set for yourself. You can achieve anything you set your mind to, or set your habits to at least.
I hope this newsletter was helpful, if you have any questions or comments please let me know by reply